i always write about he, she, and them but I rarely open up about me. (well directly anyway). you know how people have those life defining moments, the thing that make them discover themselves and go on this whole soul searching bid. honestly i never thought i would have that moment because i felt like i knew where my soul was. i was wrong that moment has come and it was a book that made me wonder, it has really changed my life. i feel like i have been living in this predictable bubble that everything i do is so mundane. i do whats expected. as much as i yearn to live off pure instinct i guess im kind of, dare i say it......scared. i feel like i have the courage to find my dream after reading this book. it made me feel like nothing is out of my reach. i feel like i can master the guitar if i want to, i can become an actress, a socialite, and become some famous name in the fashion industry. i can really do it if i want to because i now have the urge to discover who i really am. forget about being shy and embarrassed easier than im impressed, forget about other people's opinions of me and what they expect me to be. its time to discover who i am and do it alone.

All The Right Words!

He said all the right words. Everything I longed to hear. He gave it to me. Hesistantly....but still he gave it to me. I thought I would finally be relieved that everything I wanted to here would excite me. It didn't. I wasn't ecstatic. I kind of did not feel anything at all. A and a half year ago when he told m everything I never thought I would hear I was crushed. I couldn't breath. My lungs felt like they had collapsed, my heart felt like I went into cardiac arrest, and my stomach felt like it was somewhere near my feet. Overall I was heartbroken. Kind of stayed stagnant like that for a while. Finally after a few dozen months I finally realized ok he isn't coming back. I accepted it and began the process of moving on. Now that I have he wants to come back. He said everything I yearned to hear month and months ago. The words just doesn't seem that powerful after I have let go. Why is it that all the right words are said at the wrong time?